I like turtles, and heartburn free girls Here is what Im sick of:


- Girls who claim to be unlike the rest, when they are shallower than a pitchers mound

- Girls who use the fact that they know the difference between "then", and "than" to justify their higher intelligence

- Girls who think that all guys interact with them with only the goal of sex in mind. Except for the "hot" guys because "hot" guys just want to be their true friends

- Girls who think that men with facial hair are going to rape them

- Girls who will sleep with the womanizing lead singer of their favorite band, yet make consistent feministic implications

- Girls who think they are funny, and cant make a kid laugh

- Girls who eat falafels just to be seen by the local Arab community with their converse shoes and tight black jeans waiting in line at Abdul Wahab's food joint, when they really wanted a #1 with no onions from Burger King

- Girls who will respond to this post JUST to tell me that Im funny, as if I am unaware of the pleasing phenomenon of the effective usage of intention over magnitude of sarcasm

- Girls who will respond to this post just because I used "big" words

- Girls who are aware of all of this, but will NOT reply to this post because they truly are seeking a dumb guy, when I can be just as dumb

- Girls who will read this and not respond if they're not going to tell me Im funny, or to tell me I use big words, or if they're not seeking a dumb guy

- Dark green lettuce. Its just gross.

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